This week last year my 2024 Journal stopped receiving entries. I just put it down and didn’t write in it for a while. I would have helped though I should have kept writing because I went through a bad funk at the beginning of the year last year. That is depression though, you stop doing things you once loved.
I am still writing in my 2025 journal though so that will be the entries here for a while. There are still some for 2024 but I will add those when I get there.

Saturday February 3, 2024

Without the other. Just that when one died their partner jus decided not to continue living. At the time I didn’t realize the significance of what I was reading, but why would I? This article wouldn’t come back to me again until much later in life. If I had known then what I know today maybe I would have researched more. The reason why, was it love? Was it the full trust in another person? Or was it just simply the fact that the life they knew and had become so comfortable in, was now forever changed so they just decided it was easier to lay down and die. It seem to make so much more sense now.

Monday February 3, 2025

OK here we are on Monday. I start training for another section of my new position today. After work I am going to clean the house a little then probably take a shower and If I am not too tired work on my story some more. I decided to flesh out the story I was writing last year in my journal and focusing on just that. My problem is I start something get to a certain point stop, then never pick it up again. Which is what I am trying hard to change this year. I follow through with everything else I don’t know why I don’t follow through with this, writing I mean. I don’t know why I don’t finish I have a lot of things in my head at one time. Also Dan talks a lot, he’s talking right now. That’s alright though he’s good to talk to and I love him. So anyway got the junk out of my head and I can do other stuff today like work, ugh. One day I’ll become famous.

Sunday February 4, 2024

When the end came it wasn’t like in the movies. There was no war, no zombie-like creatures of any kind. A virus didn’t wipe out half of all humans. Nature didn’t turn against the world. People just started to die. It was like they all just stopped living. Arthur Clark had worked hard most of his adult life to become a doctor. Now in his 40’s and several years into his own practice he had started thinking about stepping back. It was time he thought while gathering his things then walking out the office door locking it behind him. He loved what he did, loved his staff and his patients, but he needed to resign.

Tuesday February 4, 2025

I actually did everything I said I was going to do yesterday. I cleaned after work and I wrote some more of my story. It was a good Monday. Today I plan on doing the same thing but today I have to clean my mom’s room also. I need to wash my sheets and blankets too but laundry day is tomorrow so I’ll do that then. The illness of last week passed through us all, it’s done now hopefully. There is not much that goes on when my boys are with their dad. It’s peaceful I guess I need that sometimes but I like it a lot better when they are here. Also, when they are not here I don’t have a lot to say in my journal. I think of different things throughout the day so I have a notebook that I write random things in as well. I also have this weird thing where I have to use certain pens. The one I’m using now I also use to write in my personal planner but I have a different one for my notebook. Is that weird? I don’t know, never will.

Monday February 5, 2024

He drove home kissed his wife ate the dinner she made then played a board game with his son and daughter. Feeling more at peace than he had in a long time, Arthur went to bed and never woke up. The doctors who examined him would tell his wife there was no cause of death. They would tell her it was like he just decided not to live anymore. Doctor Arthur Clarkes death would be the first of this strange manner of death that would take out almost everyone on the planet. His wife and children would live on, but their lives would be miserable. They would come to be in my life, but much later. There is a lot for me to go through first.

Wednesday February 5, 2025

I had weird dreams last night. In one my sister had invited all these people over to my house. I made them all leave because she didn’t ask and she was setting up a buffet in my bedroom. In the dream she got mad and said I was ruining wedding day. I told her she couldn’t just have an event at our house and not ask. It was so weird. Sometimes I read these silly stories on Facebook that are most likely fake. The one I read last night was a girl who bought these expensive gifts for her husband on his birthday, but on hers he just gave her a keychain. She got mad, they fought, so a few days later he comes back with a leather bound journal with her initials and wrote in the pages how much he loved her etc. This, she thought, was a better gift, but I feel like I’d be like ‘great now I have a journal I can’t write in and a goofy keychain.’ In real life though I’d just be happy with the keychain. They gave us one at work once about five years ago and I still use it for my keys.

Tuesday February 6, 2024

Something woke me up early one Sunday morning. I sat straight up trying to make sense of it, not knowing really what it was. A noise? A dream? I didn’t know. A quick glance at my phone told me it was 5 in the morning. Searching the house for a reason why I woke up my mind began to wander. My whole life has been a search for a reason. Every ones life was right? An endless Why? Or What? Or When? And Where? Did any of us ever find a reason? Probably not, after all it’s why things happen right? A reason? Not finding the source of my early morning wake up call, I decided to make coffee sitting in my chair and watch TV. I was going to have to work today anyway, might as well get the day started.

Thursday February 6, 2025

I almost started writing in my journal today on the wrong day. I was looking at the page thinking, ‘wait, wasn’t yesterday the fifth? Also, I’m pretty sure it’s not Saturday.’ So, I flipped back to the right day and now I’m pretty sure I haven’t fallen through some kind of time warp. I’m glad I started cleaning during the week because now I have more time for hobbies on the weekend. Also now that Harry has a job he works and is out of the house more so he doesn’t need entertaining. For some reason in my illustrious job-hopping career, I decided to be an in-school suspension teacher. I hated it, and the kids sucked and they were nasty. Kids today are the worst. Anyway, I just kind of left over the Thanksgiving break. I was trapped in the room all day. It sucked and I’ll never do that ever again. Also, one of the vice principals and the principal most likely had a thing going on.

Wednesday February 7, 2024

One thing about life that will never disappoint you is that it will always disappoint you. That day nothing went right. In the middle of the workday my power went out. Normally at a place of work this wouldn’t be a big deal you would just wait with the other members of your office until the lights came back on, but I work from home and only my power was out. In such a crisis if you lose power my company requires your presence in the office so you don’t stop work from being completed. After an hour of no power, I made plans to go to the office, got all packed up then, the lights came back. I had two hours of work left.

Friday February 7, 2025

We had some plumbing issues yesterday. Our toilets weren’t flushing. The plumbers came out and they put an auger down the vent on the roof. They pulled out a huge chunk of baby wipes and a tampon. I don’t use tampons and haven’t bought baby wipes since my sons were babies. Dan said the guy told him it could have been there for years, I was like ‘That’s horrifying.’ For some reason my mind went to the earth in like one thousand years and archeologists digging up old baby wipes and tampons. I can see them putting them under a microscopes and saying, ‘This is what they used to wipe baby butts.’ I feel like they will still know what tampons are, women’s hygiene products don’t change much. There are more people coming today so I will have to pause work to talk to them. All that is fine but if they pull more strange items out of there I am not sure I can handle that.

My journal entries from 2024 end here.

Saturday February 8, 2025

I’m glad it’s Saturday but I’m also very tired. It was a long week, with the toilets not working and getting fixed then with the plumbers telling us the plumbing in this house is basically fucked. I mean we just rent here we aren’t going to pay for a $40K plumbing fix. I feel like they might try to spin it and say we are the ones who wrecked the plumbing but it’s been this way since we moved in and we have a paper trail of all the times we complained about the plumbing. So on to other things I have to get out of the house today. Go for a walk or something. It has been nice weather and since my schedule changed and I have to take Harry to work it’s been hard for me to breathe and relax. I hate that. He got his first paycheck Friday and I asked him, ‘It feels good doesn’t it?’ he said ‘yea.’ I’m proud of the kid he’s made it two weeks. Hopefully he will make it even longer.

Sunday February 9, 2025

Harry works at 8am today and he is already up, good for him I guess. I am up to take him, but for really would rather be sleeping. Yesterday was a beautiful day, the weather was so nice. We all went for a walk then ate at Chick-Fil-A. When we came home I took a three-hour nap. It was a good day. Today I am not sure what I want to do but it will consist of sitting and relaxing. I’ll probably finish my sweater. I’ve been diligently working on it for two weeks now. I like how it’s turning out it was a free pattern and sometimes those are meh, but this one is pretty good. I guess it depends on where you get it from. I feel like some design patterns for people to wear just kind of flop it together sometimes or they make it a little different or intentionally difficult so you have to pay for their tutorials. This is annoying especially since I am an experienced knitter. I already know but for a newbie I think it would make them give up.